I'm in an odd mood. It could be the fact that I just listened to JayZ's "Can I Get A", followed immediately by some King Diamond. It could be the fact that it's 7:19am and I've been staring at my company's webserver for the past 8 hours trying to get this fucker to act like a responsible web server. And before I get any complaints, I'm super super sorry for saying that four letter word. From now on I'll say fuck.

Where was I? Oh yeah, I could be the reason that I just typed a big ole' personal message in the forums making me consider opening up a personal forum. It's highly egotistical, but this is of course my website on my hardware using my bandwidth stroking my ego... Seriously, I've been wanting to talk about things other than just games and Bellicose. Besides, this isn't gamejournal.familydisease.com, it's journal.familydisease.com. And I, MalkavQ, am the Family Disease.... or something like that. Anyway, I'm going to start working on a few things as soon as I've gotten this fucking server working. I can see it in your eyes... your dying to know. Don't worry my child, I'll tell you.

• A new and improved forum that doesn't have sloppy HTML code and hard to read messages. This time I'll work for more than 5 hours on it and show some quality.
• A new domain! That's right, I just can't contain myself. Tina told me that she wanted a website and I ordered up a hot slice of gamenews.org. In the words of the great president Abraham Lincoln: "It's ass-ugly". Give us some time, it's on my plate, I'm just busy chewin' the liver to get to the yummies.
• I'm actually going to do something with the familydisease! That's right, I'm going to put some content there. Not sure what yet. Probably just a pretty opening page to it's subservers, but something more than that shitty ANSI login screen, despite it's nostalgic value.
• Possible news about a new job... Actually, I'm entertaining 3 job offers right now. One of these jobs is a kicker... I'd have to move (which sucks) but given a choice, it'd be the one I take. I'll have more on this later.

Now, while I've got you on the horn, and this has become a personal rant, I think I'll get a few other things off my chest that I've been wanting to say. Firstly, game related: Asheron's Call kicks some major ass! I've been really faithful to UO, but AC has won me over by far. Next is the fact that I want a house. I want one badly and will work hard for one. Apartments suck. I've got a great view of the Cincinnati skyline (Mmmm, chili...), but I want land. I want a yard. Call me crazy, but I want to cut grass, and I'm not talking the illegal kind. I want to sit outside in the shade in my own yard. I want to be able to turn up the volume on my music without hearing my half-wit neighbors banging on the walls. I want a house that I can gut out. Open the walls and the floors and run cables. In my apartment I've got an ugly ass network of cables working the surround sound for the TV/DVD/VCR/PSX/DC/etc. Even more cables to send the output of my computer to it's speakers. Even more cables to attach all the computers into the hub and more to go to the DSL. I want to punch a hole in the floor and run all those cables through it. I want to be able to hand shelves. God damn, it's as if the gene for Male Tinker Syndrome has been activated in me, cause I've got a strong urge to do some roofing.

And other thing. I'd fallen off the weight-loss wagon. It was good, I exercised, but it ended about 9 months early. Well, god damn it, consider me back on. Mark my words (which is quite easy, since they're already printed), I will be overweight no longer. I don't care if I have to do sit-ups every night until my sides split open. I don't care if I have to stop drinking the love of my life (all hail the Dr. Pepper). I'm determined on this, and I will succeed. Call it ego, call it overconfidence, I don't care. I get what I want, and I want to lose this weight. I wanted to quit smoking, and after 10 fucking years of putting away a pack a day, I gave that shit the boot. Next on the chopping block is my lack of physical fitness. After that, who knows, probably gonna teach myself financial stability. But for now, I'm essentially pissed at my lethargy at getting started. Well, those days are over; I'm not gonna sit idly by and watch myself grow more out of shape and less active. Fuck that. I'm changing my life for the better, and I don't need anyone to support me or goad me on. That's my job. MalkavQ doesn't need anyone helping. It's not that I don't want the help, but the fact that it's just not needed. When I'm honestly ready, I provide my own motivation.

Well, I think I've said enough tonight. Again, great big hoopty apologies for all of you offended by my strong language in this post, but like I said, I'm in an odd mood.

I wish a had a little red box
To put my memories in.
I'd take them out and
and put them in again.